Rough Love
by Shinjidoggysasuka
Summary: These stories explore Shinji and Asuka's relationship in every sense, including behind closed doors. I'll make this clean as possible, but there are lemons. And plot twists. Enjoy, for it is complete!
1. rough love

**Rough Love:**

**A Shinji X Asuka lemon**

**After another uneventful day at school, Shinji would have usually been relived to get home from school, if it wasn't for the redheaded demon behind him. It had been over a month since they had defeated Israfel together, but for some reason, she didn't move out afterwards. Shinji always wondered what was going through the heads of the adults when they did something like this. Could this be fathers way of making him miserable? As they neared the door, Shinji and Asuka noticed a small slip of paper attached to the door.**

**Asuka ran ahead and snatched it off. All of the sudden she exclaimed, "Mein got im himmel! How can she do this, it's her turn to cook!" She threw the note to the side and stormed into their apartment. As Shinji walked in, he picked up the note and read it. **

**It was from Misato. It said, "Hey guys, I'm not going to be home till early tomorrow, I have some more paperwork to fill out. You guys figure out dinner, okay? And tell Asuka I said behave, okay? See ya in the morning. -Misato"**

**Shinji sighed. He knew this was going to be a ****long**** night. He walked in and told Asuka he was going to cook, then he put his bag in his room and changed. He walked into the kitchen and began getting things together. As he was getting the pans, he saw Asuka skulk into the bathroom and thought to himself, "This is going to be a REALLY **long night indeed."

For dinner he prepared curry and rice, it was all he felt like putting together. As they sat down to eat, Shinji noticed Asuka was moving around in her chair as if she were uncomfortable. Shinji asked Asuka what was wrong, and she said, "nothing, its nothing, it's just, ummm….., what the hell did you put in this curry, it sucks." She got up and ran back into the bathroom. Shinji sighed and began clearing the table.

As he cleared Asuka's spot, he noticed a few little specks of red liquid. It was then he realized what was going on, Asuka was on her period, she was just acting hormonal. He wiped up the spot on the chair and took her plate to the kitchen. Then he walked to the door of the bathroom and said, "I know what's going on Asuka, its okay, if there's anything I can do, tell me okay?" All he heard was silence.

In the bathroom Asuka was fuming. "Now Baka-Shinji's getting all high and mighty, talking to me like he knows how I feel. He's a boy, he doesn't have to deal with stuff like this." Somewhere in her mind though, she thought to herself, "He's only trying to be nice." She calmed down, wiped her eyes, then got another piece of toilet paper and cleaned herself off.

When she got out, she went to find Shinji to, well, she hated it, but to thank him. "Stupid boy, I hate having to do stuff like this.", she thought to herself. She found him in the living room sleeping on the couch. She then noticed the rise in Shinji's shorts. She frowned and said to herself, "Sick little schweiner, I bet he's thinking about all kinds of disgusting things."

As she watched him, Shinji moaned in his sleep and said something that gave Asuka a devious idea. She took off Shinji's socks, then ran to her room. She got two things, the condoms they gave out in Sex-Ed class, and an oddly shaped box. She snickered to herself as she came back into the living room. "So your that kind of boy, eh Shinji? We're going to play some fun little games this evening dummkopf."

Shinji woke up to the feeling of his shirt slipping off. He opened his eyes and saw Asuka tossing it to the side and moving to do the same with his shorts. Startled, he fell off the couch and began scooting backwards towards the wall. When he got his back to it he said, "Asuka, what were you just doing!?", in a startled voice. He knew something was about to happen that he might not like.

Asuka said, "I want to see your body, I'm not going to take off your underwear, I just want to see what you look like." Shinji asked, "Why, why do you want to see my body!?" Asuka walked over and forcefully pulled off his shorts saying, "Why are you asking, didn't you say I should just tell you if I need something. Well maybe I need this." Then she started laughing.

Shinji's face turned pink, and he asked her what she thought was funny. "Really Shinji, I knew you were kind of nerdy, but really, briefs, I bet your man bits have been crushed into almost nothing by now. You must be real small, eh?" Shinji's face turned a bright red and said, "Shut up, their big enough." "Oh really Shinji, tell ya what, you take those briefs off and prove it, and ill show you my breasts.", Asuka said with a sly smile.

Shinji said, "What guarantee do I have that you'll keep up your end of the bargain?" "How about this, ill take off my top first, then you take off your briefs, will that work?" Without waiting for Shinji's response, she slowly took off her cutoff jean shorts, lifted her top over her head, then unhooked her bra, revealing he supple breasts. Shinji swallowed real hard and stared. He couldn't believe his eyes, was this actually happening?

"Now Shinji, its time for you to keep up your end of the bargain.", said Asuka. She came over to where he sat on the floor, put her arms around his waist, slowly eased them down to his waistband, and eased his briefs off of him. She heard a smack as his piece hit his stomach. "It's so big.", she thought to herself, "No, can't think of that now, I'm on a mission!" She started kissing his chest, and as she did that, she put a condom over the object that was in the box from her room.

Shinji couldn't believe it, he was naked on the floor of the living room with a topless Asuka, and as perfect as it seemed, he knew something was up. He laid down on his back as Asuka kissed him, aware her hand was between his legs. Then all of a sudden he felt a sharp pain between his hips. He looked down in horror to see an oblong object enter his body. He felt it enter and push against his insides.

He cried in a mixture of shock, pain, and to his dismay, pleasure. Then Asuka hit the switch on the back of the object, a vibrator, and Shinji felt his insides melt. Asuka felt a sense of satisfaction and superiority watching Shinji squirm in pleasure from something so demeaning. Shinji was ashamed, it felt so good inside him, massaging his insides. He knew it was supposed to feel bad, but to it felt so wonderful.

Shinji began to weep on the floor and he cried out to Asuka, "Why, why me? I was only concerned about you, and now you've violated me like this!?" Asuka's face straightened, and she began to feel guilty. "Shinji wasn't all that bad, he was kind, he always looked out for her, he was cu… wait, what was I about to say, cute?" She then knew what she was going to do.

She rolled Shinji on his back, and put another condom on his still erect piece. She said to him, "I'm sorry Shinji, I hope this will make it feel a little better." She slipped off her panties, lowered herself onto Shinji's piece, then plunged the head of it into her spot. They both felt a shot of pleasure, and Shinji moaned in ecstasy. Asuka said, "Its going to be okay, I'm going to make you feel real nice, okay?

She began to move herself up and down on him, pulling him in and out, in and out. Shinji couldn't believe how good he felt, he still was ashamed, but he just didn't care anymore. Asuka felt so good on him, and the vibrator made his insides tingle. Asuka was impressed with how big Shinji was, he felt so good inside her. They both were hoping the other felt good.

After a few minutes, Asuka reached her climax. Her walls tightened around Shinji's piece, and she shook in ecstasy. Shinji felt his butt tighten, and as he came, the vibrator shot out of him and rolled over the floor. Asuka was startled, and Shinji turned red with embarrassment. "Sorry,", he said, "when I came, it felt so good, and well, it kind of came out of there all on its own."

Asuka laughed and took the condom off of Shinji. All of his warm cum flowed out and over his piece and nuts, down to his butt. It was then Asuka noticed that the condom wasn't on the vibrator. She told Shinji, "Hold on, this is going to be a little unpleasant." She then rubbed her fingers on his butt, found the opening of the condom crowning the hole, and pulled it out. Shinji moaned and came again, and Asuka's face had a look of surprise on it.

She lay down next to him, put her face close to his, and said to him, "Shinji, I think your Bi-Sexual." Shinji's face turned beet red, and he said to her, "Well, maybe, but I just, well, I don't think I could do anything like that with anyone but you." Asuka blushed, and asked him why. Shinji hesitantly said, "Well, I guess I love you." They were both silent for a while.

Asuka broke the silence and said, "I hope I didn't make you feel uncomfortable, did I hurt you, I'm sorry if I did, what can I do to fix thi…." Shinji grabbed Asuka and kissed her, then said, " Its okay, I'm fine. It hurt at first, but it felt good in the end." Shinji and Asuka both blushed, then Asuka smiled, eased her hand between Shinji's legs, and felt his anus. It was still a little loose, and it was covered in his own cum from when she removed the condom from his piece. Asuka then moved her hand up and fondled his nuts.

Shinji squinted in pleasure and said, " Asuka, do you love me too?" She paused, though about it, and said, "Well, I guess I do, I don't really know, I mean sometimes you tick me off, but your kind, and caring, and sweet, and you always look out for me." they blushed again, and stared at each other in silence for a while. Then Asuka said, "Do you want to do this again sometime?" Shinji smiled and said, "Yeah, but next time if your going to use a vibrator, find one that isn't as thick."

THE END ;)

* * *

Baka = jerk

Mein got im himmel = my god in heaven

Schweiner = pig

Dummkopf = stupid head (yeah, real mature Asuka, well, we still love ya.)


	2. a surprise on the 25th

**A Surprise on the 25th**

**Asuka said, "Do you want to do this again sometime?" Shinji smiled and said, "Yeah, but next time if your going to use a vibrator, find one that isn't as thick." Asuka smiled at him and said, "You naughty boy.", in a sexy voice. "Well Asuka, your sleeping on my homework!" Asuka woke up to see the scrawny wimp standing over her. **

"**Mein got in himmel, what kind of dream was that!?" Shinji stared at her with an inquisitive glance. "What was that about Asuka?" "Nothing", she replied. She realized she had probably dreamt the whole thing, and was trying to figure out what made her dream such a thing when she still noticed Shinji staring at her like a dumb ox.**

"**What are you staring at!?", she screamed at him. "Nothing, its just you did something funny in your room, then you came out here mumbling and went to sleep on the couch, are you sure you don't want something to eat?" Looking at Shinji's kind smile, Asuka blushed. She quickly rushed to her room and closed the shutter. "Mein got, I think that, well, I think I might have the hot's for Baka-Shinji. **

**For the next few months, things went as usual as Asuka pondered that dream she had. During this time Shinji became uneasy at Asuka's abnormal behavior. For some reason unbeknownst to him, Asuka avoided Shinji at school and NERV headquarters, and when they were home she didn't talk to him period. Shinji was worried that he had offended Asuka. The months went by and winter began.**

**December 23****rd****, 2015**

**1:20 PM**

**Neo-Tokyo District 3 Middle School, Room 2A**

"**Two days till Christmas. These Japanese don't celebrate it like we do in Germany. Still, this is as good a time as ever to make my move." Asuka had finally decided over the months to try shying up to Shinji see how he felt about her. As a prelude to this, she had began giving him hard time like usual, all the while trying to mask the emotions she was still trying to figure out in her mind. **

**She had finally decided to ask Shinji to help her with some last minute shopping, and turn it into a date. All she had to do was approach him. "Now is the time Asuka, lets get this right!" She slowly skulked up behind him and grabbed his shoulder. "Hey Shin-ji!" she said in a sing-song voice.**

**When he realized Asuka was on his shoulder, Shinji jumped and though to himself, "This isn't good." He could tell by the tone of her voice she wanted something. "Y-yes Asuka?" he said timidly. She flashed him a sly grin, re-confirming his suspicions that something was up. "Hey Shinji, I have some last minute shopping to do for Christmas and I need a little help, you mind coming with me tomorrow and showing me were the best places to shop would be?"Something was definitely up, but Shinji knew he would be in hot water if he said no. Time for a last minute ditch effort. "Why don't you ask Hikari? I'm sure she could help you out much better than I can." "Oh, well I already asked her, but she said she'd be busy tomorrow, so you're the only other person I could think of to ask." Damn, no way out of it now.**

"**O-okay, I guess I'll see you tomorrow after school then." "Okay Shinji, see you then!" The trap was properly baited, not she all she had to do was go through with her plan. Even after that stupid kiss he still hadn't gotten the hint, but this would show him her exact intentions, hopefully. "But then of course Baka is pretty thick, I can only hope this is enough." she said to herself.**

**December 24****th****, 2015**

**3:24 PM**

**Neo-Tokyo 3 shopping district**

"**Where is that damned baka!?", shouted an impatient Asuka. He was supposed to meet her at the shopping center at 3:25, so she came early to look around. She was sitting on a bench fuming when he approached. "Damnit, he's still wearing his uniform, he isn't taking this seriously. As Shinji walked up, he noticed Asuka in her yellow dress. **

"**I'm on time Asuka, its 3:25 just liked you asked me", he said blushing. Asuka was pleased at the reaction she got from him, but she had to remain cool. "What are you smiling at Dummkopf, you may be on time, but any gentleman would always come early to meet a lady! What do you have to say for yourself?" "ummm, im sorry, I just didn't know.", said a flustered Shinji."**

"**Well you should have!" Asuka grabbed Shinji's arm and dragged him off. They looked at a few clothing shops first and Asuka tried on dresses. Shinji thought to himself, "This almost feels like a date." He noticed one dress in particular, and when Asuka wasn't looking he bought it. **

**He thought he would surprise her with it the next morning, if he could keep her from it till then. Next they went to a store that sold jewelry. Shinji and Asuka put together their money to buy Misato some expensive earrings. "Hopefully she doesn't have the early morning shift, I want to see the look on her face when we give her this in the morning. Thanks for helping Shinji, I guess your not totally useless." Shinji frowned at her for the remark. **

**When they entered the book store, Shinji stormed off quickly into the rows. It took Asuka fifteen minutes to find him. He was in the manga section, sitting cross-legged on the floor reading a copy of Gundam Wing. Asuka was amazed at how content he looked. She had never seen him look so serene. **

**As she observe Shinji reading, she got an idea. She shook him on the shoulder to get his attention and told him to look for a book on children's psychology for Ritsuko. As he walked off to find the educational book section, Asuka went to the counter and bought the book Shinji was reading. Shinji came back with the book, paid for it, and then they left. They continued walking till they came to a vendor.**

**Asuka's stomach was growling, so Shinji took the opportunity to impress her. He bought some strawberry crêpes from the vendor and gave one to Asuka saying, "I thought you might be hungry." "Good work Dummkopf, there might be a gentleman in there after all." she quickly consumed the crêpes. Shinji was glad she liked them, but knew he would have to share his with her.**

**He noticed a little bit of the filling on her lips and moved in to wipe it off. Asuka noticed, and thought he had gotten the message. As he came closer she closed her eyes and puckered her lips. She felt a small brush on her cheeks, then nothing. For a few seconds there was silence, then Shinji said, "Asuka, why are you making that face?"**

**Asuka opened her eyes to see Shinji staring at her. Her faced turned red, then she slapped him and ran. Shinji sat in silence, looking at her and wondering what was up. Then he remembered the night when Kaji brought Misato back from that wedding party drunk. He touched his cheek, now red from more than the slap, and said to himself, "She wanted to kiss me, on the lips."**

**When he got home he could see Asuka was still mad. For the rest of the night they avoided each other. **

**Until midnight that is.**

**December 24****th**** 2015**

**11:55 PM**

**Misato had the late night and early morning shifts. Things were getting pretty Busy lately around NERV, of course they had always been since he got there. She had left at eight, and after she left, Asuka holed herself up in her room. Shinji had been endlessly thinking about what had happened that afternoon. He resolved to come in at midnight, give her the present he got her, and apologize. **

**He brought the dress to her in a box, he had tried feebly to wrap it himself, but it looked quite messy. "It the thought that counts, right? Besides, the gift is amazing. She'll love it." As he came to the door he put the box behind his back and out on his most somber look. **

**He was about to enter when he noticed through the cracked door that Asuka was staring forlornly at something. His eyes widened as he realized it was the book he was reading at the bookstore earlier. He knocked on the door, then slowly slid it open. By the time he came in, Asuka had hidden the book and donned a look of annoyed anger. "what do you want Baka-Shinji? **

**Shinji came in and handed her the box after pulling it from behind his back. "I bought this for you as a Christmas present, but I guess it's an apology gift now too, merry Christmas." When Asuka saw the horrible job he had done wrapping it, she couldn't stay mad at him for long. "I guess I accept your apology Shinji." Unwrapped it and gasped. "My dress, the one I tried on!" Shinji said, "I thought you looked nice in it, so I bought it when you were busy buying Hikari something. **

**Asuka told Shinji to close his eyes. He closed them, half expecting something horrible to happen, then Asuka said, " open them now. She was holding the book he had been reading. She handed it to him and said, I thought you might like this. Shinji thanked her and said, "How did you know I liked this so much?"**

**She blushed, looked down, then said, "Well, hen you were reading it in the store today, you looked serene. I've never seen you look so happy and content." Shinji stared at her for the longest while, then asked her, "Asuka, were you going to kiss me earlier today at the crêpes stand?" Asuka's blush deepened. She looked down, knowing the jig was up, knowing that Shinji knew how she felt, but didn't feel the same way. **

**All of a sudden Shinji grabbed her, brought her close, and kissed her. They locked lips for what seemed like an eternity. When Shinji finished, he took a breath, then said in a voice full of shame, that's probably the only thing I've ever done that wasn't cowardly. Asuka stared at him. She grabbed his loins and pulled him in passionately kissing him.**

**December 25****th**** 2015**

**12:00 AM **

**Asuka was kissing him, and what's more, she was groping him too. Shinji had never been so amazed of full of pleasure in all of his 14 years. She slowly began taking off his shirt, so he slipped off the cut-off jeans she was wearing. They kept passionately kissing all the while. As Shinji went to remove her shirt Asuka pulled a condom out of her jeans. **

**She handed it to Shinji and said, "since were going to do this, I want you to put this on." any other day Shinji would have stopped and stared at her with an embarrassed flush after thinking about that, but now he couldn't even stop to think, all of the blood had rushed from his head to somewhere else. When she pulled off his pants he slipped the condom over his piece, then slid off her panties and plunged it into her. She gasped in pleasure and Shinji grunted. He began slowly thrusting, Asuka's warm insides and her supple body against his were all he could think about. Asuka though to herself, "This is even better than I dreamed it would be."**

**They continued, Shinji thrusting, Asuka pulling him in and kissing his chest. As she climaxed the first time, her walls tightened around Shinji. He moaned, his body had never felt this good, not even from masturbating. He came inside of her, the condom filling like a balloon. Asuka gasped and called Shinji's name. He pulled out and they sat there for a while, then they went for another round. **

**December 25****th**** 2015**

**1:35 PM**

"**I think we should stop now and go to bed, we have school tomorrow." "We can ditch, or have you run out of stamina on me?", Asuka said with a coy smile. "Heck no, ill show you stamina!", Shinji shouted. "That's more like it." said Asuka, then she said in a more quite voice, "I love you Shinji, merry Christmas." Shinji smile at her and whispered back, "Merry Kurimatsu to you too." **

**Merry Kurimatsu**

**By the way, this time its not a dream. ; )**


	3. caught!

* you'll have to excuse my mistake in the last chapter, I just realized that I put 1:35 PM instead of 1:35 AM. Gomen nasai, ill have to spend a lot more time during my editing process. ^_^u

** Oh, a small note, in Japan you don't get off for Christmas, in fact the only day of the year you don't have to work is the emperors birthday. Kind of sucks, doesn't it? (no pun was intended in the first half of this fun fact, if you perceived one then your as much of a pervert as me.)

Caught!

December 25th 2015

1:35 AM

Shinji smiled at her and whispered back, "Merry Kurimatsu to you too." Then, instead of starting up again, Shinji grabbed her waist and held her in a tight embrace. He said, "Lets take a break, we have all the time in the world." And so they lay there, enjoying each others warmth and presence. Neither of the two could remember any time in their life when they felt as comfortable and content as they did now.

They lay that way for another half hour, then Asuka asked Shinji if he was ready again. But the boy had already fallen asleep. She stared at him and mulled in her head the idea that she was attracted to him. She just couldn't understand, in her eyes he was pathetic, annoying, a little whining child, but still, she loved the attention she got from him, loved the feel of his skin against hers. "Hmmm, I thought Shinji was pathetic, but maybe im the one who is pathetic. At least Shinji had the courage to go this far the first time I admitted my feelings to him.

Laying there she noticed his steady breathing. She was amazed at the pace, one breath in, then one breath out, all in perfect time with no deviations. She couldn't really figure out why she hadn't taken the time to notice these things before. Even though he was a coward, she realized how lucky she was that she had found such a beautiful boy, but at the same time she was afraid what others would think when they revealed their relationship. As she fell asleep to the hypnotic tone of the boys breathing, she thought to herself that they would both have to hide their relationship for a little longer till she figured out how to tell everyone.

9:05 Am

Misato walked in the door. She thanked god for her luck, Ritsuko had offered to help with the paperwork she had to fill out, and they had finished in record time. Now she could get more sleep, coming home early was probably the best gift she would get all day. She went to the kitchen to see if Shinji had left her anything from when he cooked breakfast for himself and Asuka, but was surprised to find there wasn't even a pan in the sink. " Well, Asuka must have badgered him into skipping school with her, she dose have the right since Christmas is a big holiday for westerners." She decided to wake Shinji and Asuka up and give them a tongue lashing before having Shinji cook breakfast and sending him off to school.

She walked to Shinji's room first to wake him up, but he wasn't in his bed. "Maybe he did go to school, but then why didn't he cook breakfast for Asuka or himself?" She went to Asuka's room to wake her up and ask her what was going on. She opened the shutter and was about to call Asuka's name when she paused and gasped. She stood and stared and still couldn't believe her eyes.

Shinji was in Asuka's bed, apparently naked, laying next to Asuka who appeared to be naked too. There was a used condom wrapper on the floor, and their clothing was spread about the room. Misato couldn't clam herself because there was only one logical explanation. She grabbed Shinji and pulled him out of the bed, consequentially waking both of the hormone ridden adolescents up. They both were startled and knew in that one instant that they had both been caught.

Misato yelled at them. " What the hell were you two doing, you know you have no business doing that kind of thing, your not adults yet." Asuka clenched the blanket to herself, and Shinji tried to cover his indecency with the one hand Misato didn't have a death grip on. Misato tossed Shinji out of the room, closed the shutter, and began yelling at Asuka. Shinji slinked to his room, put on some underwear and a pair of pants, then sat in the living room and waited for the inevitable.

When Misato was done with Asuka, she brought her out to the living room and stared at them both. They sat like that for a while in perfect silence. Misato broke the silence. "Shinji, pack up your things." Asuka began to protest, but Shinji stood up and said, "Yes Misato-san." Asuka stared at him angrily and yelled, "You damn wimp, I can't believe I slept with a pathetic excuse of a man like you, I never want to see you again!"

Promptly after saying this she ran to her room again and slammed the shutter. Shinji reverted to his sheltered look he used to conceal his emotions and walked silently to his room. Misato regretted saying what she had said and wished she could have taken it back. She didn't particularly want Shinji to leave, but she couldn't have them living together if they were doing these kinds of things. She never wanted to break up the young couple, but now she had.

In his room Shinji had begun packing his stuff when he picked up the book Asuka had given him yesterday. Suddenly he couldn't hold back his emotions. He buried his face in his pillow and began to cry. This was the first time in his life he had ever felt for anyone in this way, and now it was over as soon as it had began. He felt as if someone had punched him in the stomach.

In Asuka's room she was handling her emotions in a far different way. In anger she had torn up the dress Shinji had gotten her. "Why the hell did I even trust that fucking maggot! I poured my feelings out to him and then he turns around and gives up that easily! I can't believe I gave that little bastard the privilege of being my first!" After she had said that, she broke down and cried.

Misato knew now that she no longer needed to have Shinji move. She came into his room and saw his face in his pillow. She said, "Shinji, you don't need to pack anymore, I guess the problem has been solved." Suddenly she realized how horrible what she said sounded, and was about to apologize, but she noticed Shinji hadn't moved an inch. She felt guilty, so she came and sat down on his bed. She ran her hand through his hair and said, "Im sorry Shinji, I didn't mean for all this to happen, but it was my duty, I couldn't let you two live together doing that kind of stuff, but if I knew what was going to happen I would have just turned a blind eye to it."

She sat there in almost complete silence, broken every now and then by one of Shinji's almost silent sobs. Then he said, "I can't even remember a time in my life that made me feel as good as it did to be with Asuka, just holding her in my arms. Im never going to feel that way ever again." Misato rubbed his back with one had and said, "It's going to be okay, this is just your first love, im sure that you'll find someone else who will make you as happy as Asuka did." Then she got up, unpacked Shinji's stuff, and left the room, but before she left, she heard him whisper, "But I don't want anyone but Asuka."

Later that evening she talked on the phone with Ritsuko about what had happened. Misato told her, "The saddest thing was that they remind me of Kaji and I when we were in college. I feel so guilty that they had to go through that." Ritsuko said, "Its for the better, we don't know how their relationship would have affected their synch-ratios. Im not going to tell anyone since it's no longer an issue, but you followed protocol, and that's all that matters. "

Misato sighed and said, "It's just like you to say something like that Ritsuko."

To be continued.


	4. never the same

_**Never the Same**_

_**January 1st**__**, 2016**_

_**4:00pm**_

_**NERV HQ testing cages**_

_**Misato sat with her arms crossed in the corner and watched the current synch test. It was Shinji and Asuka's first test since the incident. Asuka's ratio seemed unaffected, but Shinji's was lower than usual. It was still above the borderline, but the abrupt drop was alarming. She was concerned about the boy, it wasn't like him to get that attached to anyone, and she feared that this trauma might cost him his life in battle if he weren't careful. She knew she had to do something, but she couldn't figure out what. **_

_**Ritsuko too noticed the change. She too was worried, though for different reasons. They couldn't afford to loose a pilot at this point. According to the prophecies from the dead sea scrolls, there were only six angels left. As close as they were, they couldn't afford any of Shinji's emotional problems getting in the way. **_

_**4:23pm**_

_**Locker Room near Terminal Dogma**_

_**Shinji was sitting on the bench, pulling up his pants. As he put his buttoned them and guided his belt through the loops, he stared blankly in the distance. For the last six days he had felt, hollow, empty inside, like he was being held under cold water. Misato had taken up the cooking, but he had eaten very little. In school he would keep to himself, even when Toji and Kensuke would try to have him eat lunch with him.**_

_**It had gotten to the point where he had even stopped doing his chores. He had been washing the dishes, and in the process of washing a cutting knife, the thought had crossed his mind to take it to his wrist. Since then he kept to himself in his room. He would sit on his bed for hours on end staring at the ceiling. Just the act of living had begun to feel like the greatest burden to him lately, EVA aside. **_

_**He wasn't sure he would be ready to fight next time an angel appeared. He didn't even want to be in Tokyo-3 anymore. The only thing he really felt like doing was going deep into the wilderness, curling up in a ball, and hoping he would just simply disappear, cease to exist. All these emotions flowed over him like a heavy stream of hot water. He continued this train of thought as he buttoned his shirt. All of a sudden, someone tapped his shoulder, and a masculine voice said, "Come with me Shinji, we need to talk." **_

_**5:48pm**_

_**Misato's apartment.**_

_**For the last few days Asuka was acting normal. In her mind, she had just blown it off. So what if she had given her innocence to that little worm Shinji, it wasn't that big of a deal anyway. She still had her Kaji, sweet mature Kaji, he would have stood up for their love. She went about her regular business with the intent to give Shinji a harder time than ever, but recently he had hardly left his room. At first she made masturbation jokes, but nothing seemed to phase him, and loosing interest she began to just ignore him period and find other ways to entertain herself. **_

_**It didn't even phase her that Shinji wasn't in yet, but Misato was quite worried. It wasn't like him to be late. Even with his usual behavior lately he had always been home on time. She was afraid he had run away again, or worse, he had tried to end his life. She couldn't wait for him any longer. It was 5:52 and he wasn't home, so she called NERV Intelligence. They took a few minutes, then told her that he had been seen leaving Terminal Dogma with a male personnel member, and that there wasn't any apparent danger.**_

_**Misato wondered who he would have left with. Shinji didn't really interact with many of the officers. Maybe Hyuga or one of the control room personnel decided to take him out and talk to him. But then of course Hyuga and the others didn't really have a personal relationship with Shinji, so that was out of the question. Then a shocking thought crossed her mind, maybe they had come to take Shinji away, maybe he was being decommissioned and sent back to his old teacher, and she wouldn't have a chance to say goodbye.**_

_**6:17pm**_

_**Hoshihikari Café**_

_**For the past hour and a half, Kaji had been sitting next to the silent teenager. Shinji had just sat there, staring into his tea with the same vacant expression he had on his face on the trip over. Kaji had just sat there and waited for him to say something. Out of the blue Shinji said, "Why does it hurt Kaji, I didn't even care about girls till I got to know her. Before then I just kept to myself, they were like everyone else to me, but when I met her, I felt all these feelings that I had never felt before, but now that its over all I feel is pain." **_

_**Kaji sipped his bourbon and said, " Well Shinji, when you really love someone and they reject you, all you can feel is pain. Part of living, part of being a man is learning to get over that pain, and move on with your life." "You make it sound so easy, but I just can't get over her." Shinji sighed and sipped his tea, then grimaced, for it had become cold while he had sat. Kaji smiled and laughed at the poor boys little mistake.**_

_**Shinji began to return to that vacant stare again, so Kaji said, " Your pain is a little like the tea, it will soon loose it's heat, and when its gone it will leave a bitter taste, but then you can just pour it out. Its never easy however, you always have to wait." Kaji's words were not the best, but Shinji understood them. "So after a while it will hurt less. I understand, but I don't think I can ever move on, I don't think my life will ever be the same."**_

_**Kaji laughed again and said, "Shinji, there are plenty of people out there, you'll move on soon and find someone you can hold on to and who can hold on to you. Till then, you just need to keep living." A look of shock came over Shinji's face as he realized how small this could be, then a smile. "Thanks Kaji, that helped me straighten things out." Then Shinji noticed the time and realized he was late and Misato was probably looking for him. **_

_**6:30pm**_

_**Tokyo-3 Train Terminal**_

_**Misato had arrived just as a train left. As she stepped out of the car her eyes welled up. Crying wasn't a good idea, she had told Asuka she was picking up groceries, but she couldn't help it. Over the months Shinji had become like a son to her. After a few minutes she noticed a steady flow of people leaving the terminal and realized it wasn't a government train. **_

_**7:03pm**_

_**Misato's apartment**_

_**Misato crashed through the door and ran into the living room. The apartment was filled with the smell of cooking. Kaji was sitting on a futon and Asuka was fawning over him. She turned and asked Misato where the groceries were. Misato just walked past her and entered the kitchen. **_

_**Shinji was at the stove, stirring something in a boiling pot. She wiped her face, then asked him in a cheery voice, "Dose this mean your feeling better?" Shinji turned, slightly startled, then smiled and answered, "Yeah, much better." "Good, we were beginning to starve, what with your moping and all." , said Misato with a smile. Shinji laughed, then directed his attention to the pan. "Oh, by the way, Kaji is going to stay for dinner.", Shinji added.**_

_**8:30pm**_

_**As Misato walked Kaji to the door, he asked him where he had been with Shinji. He told her, "I brought him to the café to have a drink and a man-to-man talk. I helped him put things in perspective." "Well next time call me, I am his guardian." Misato said in a slightly annoyed tone. As Kaji walked away she added, "Thanks, thanks for everything, he's going to be much better."**_

_**Kaji said, "It's no problem, Ill be glad to help you anytime."**_

_**Then he whispered,**_

"_**my love"**_

_**To be continued**_

_***there might be greater spaces of time between chapters, I just began class again and my schedule is getting crazy. I appreciate your support though. **_

_**** I am also going to be producing another fan fic called "Yui's Memoirs", so that will contribute to chapter time spacing. Hope you love it just as much as you love this one too. If you have any questions, please feel free to enter a thread in doggy-kun's world, my personal forum here at fan fic. I await your questions eagerly. ; ) gomen nasai.**_


	5. Temptation and Redemption

*hey guys, a bit of news before I start, im planning on wrapping this up in three chapters so I can move on to my next work, and im postponing "Yui's memories" till I get some time to focus. My last three chapters, of which this is one, are going to be considerably longer so I can pack in more . It's real tough to work inside the cannon guys, but don't worry, your going to love my next fic even more. (its going to take place after 3I) - doggy-kun

Temptation and Redemption

April 24th, 2016

8:57 AM

NERV HQ: The office of Major Misato Katsuragi

The last few months had been a emotional roller coaster for Misato Katsuragi. Kaji had been killed, Shinji had been consumed by Leliel and his own Unit-01, Asuka was attacked by Zeurel and was left mentally unstable. Then Rei had to cause Unit-00 to destruct to destroy Armisael, only to find out she was a clone. Now for some reason Asuka was in a coma, and now the Marduke Institute was sending in the next pilot. Still, only one more angel and they could all move on with their lives.

Misato was going to take Shinji in after this, and they were going to move to Hokkaido. She was planning on telling him after they had beaten the last angel. In the last few months she had seen Shinji go through so much, so in the end she just wanted him to be able to live a normal life after all of this mess. She did however wonder what they would do with the Evangelion units after this, but they would just have to cross that bridge when they got there. For the first time in 16 years, it looked like the human race just might have a future.

9:20 AM

NERV HQ: Locker room

Shinji put on his plug suit with a blank expression. He felt lost of late, sure his time at NERV might soon be over, there was only one angel left, but he was haunted by fear and guilt. In the last four months he had been exposed to terrible secrets, and had even hurt the first girl he had ever loved. Yes, he Shinji Ikari, the ace pilot of Unit-01, the first person to ever achieve a four hundred percent synch ratio with his Evangelion, the Great Genius Shinji-Sama had put Asuka Langley Soryu into a comatose state. He hated himself so much he just wanted to curl up in a corner and die.

But he had a responsibility, so it had to wait. But when this was all over, he was going to do it, he was going to find a quiet place and end it all. He didn't deserve to live after what he had done. He just wanted to fade away after all of this, and let everyone continue with their lives. He finished up and walked out to the cages.

When he got there, he glanced at the new pilot, and instantly recognized him. He was the boy he had met the other day with white hair and red eyes like Rei's, he had called himself Kaworu Nagisa. He was kind of beautiful, like a masculine girl almost. Shinji didn't really know what to think other than the fact that with him around, defeating the last angel would be a lot easier. "Im Kaworu, Kaworu Nagisa, pleased to meet you.", he said to Shinji and Rei.

Shinji noticed that Kaworu had been staring at him while he had said this, and lightly blushed. He didn't know why, but Kaworu made him feel calm instead of uneasy. They entered the entry plugs and began the regular synch tests. As he sat in the plug, Shinji thought about the usual things that kept his synch ratio up. He soon calmed to the point where he could stay at the proper synch level.

In the Unit-02 entry plug, Kaworu had entirely different thoughts. He had his orders from SEELE, gain the affection of Unit-01's pilot, then fuse with Adam and begin the ritual. "Of course they wouldn't mind if I had a little fun with him though, after all this Shinji Ikari is kind of cute, my kind of boy.", he said to himself. He began to contemplate all of the fun he would have before this was over. As he pondered, he began to hum the tune of the lilim that he enjoyed so much.

In the control room, Misato frowned. This was truly odd, Kaworu's synch rate was already very high, and they hadn't even changed the configuration from Asuka's program to his. Who was this mysterious boy SEELE had sent. He definitely wasn't human. What was Commander Ikari thinking by letting this boy run around unsupervised?

The next day they preformed more tests.

April 25th, 2016

7:30 PM:

NERV HQ: Men's Bath's

Things had gone pretty fast, Kaworu had followed him to the baths, and now here they were, soaking next to each other talking. Shinji had asked Kaworu about himself, then they began to talk about music. Now they sat next to each other in complete silence. Kaworu was smiling, and Shinji was simply staring down at the murky water, trying not to stare at the boy next to him. For some reason Kaworu made him feel funny, in a way he had never felt before.

Seeing the time, Shinji told Kaworu it was time to go. He began to reach for a towel so they could get up, but Kaworu just stood up without a towel. He stood before Shinji, his member totally erect. Shinji blushed, and wrapped the towel around his own waist, handing Kaworu the other. He quickly got up and went to dry off.

When they stood outside the door, Kaworu asked Shinji, "Where should we go now?" "Home I guess.", Shinji answered. "With you?" said Kaworu. Shinji blushed and said, "No, I mean, well don't you have a place to go." Kaworu then said, "Isn't home such a wonderful concept, a place where you can feel welcome and refreshed."

Shinji stared at his feet for a second, then said, "I don't feel very refreshed or welcome where I am now." Kaworu then offered to let Shinji stay with him for the night. Shinji thought about it, he didn't really feel like going back to the apartment with Misato. All that waited him there were memories, hurtful memories. No, he didn't want to go back there, so he accepted Kaworu's offer.

As they walked, Kaworu thought about their conversation, and the boy walking beside him. He was more than just looks, he was charming, smart, and quaint. Kaworu had actually come to love him. He wanted Shinji for his own. He didn't want t have to destroy him and all of the other lilim.

April 25th, 2016

11:55 PM

NERV Housing: Residence of K. Nagisa

Kaworu had decided to make his move. After talking for a while Shinji fell asleep. He seemed to be just like Kaworu. So now Kaworu was going to make Shinji his own. He slipped Shinji's pants down and began kissing him.

Shinji was having a wonderful dream. In his dream someone love him, and he loved that person. They were kissing, and it felt so real. All of the sudden, he felt pressure between his thighs. He woke up to find Kaworu kissing him. Kaworu's finger was pushing on his anus.

Suddenly Kaworu's finger slipped in. Shinji let out a yelp of pain and pushed Kaworu off of him. He pulled up his pants and yelled, "What the hell were you doing!?" Kaworu smiled and said, "I thought it was your first time, so I was going to open you up a bit so it would hurt less when I went in." Shinji felt nauseous.

This was the first person he trusted in a long while, and all he wanted was to take advantage of Shinji's body. He yelled at Kaworu and called him a faggot. Suddenly he regretted those words. Kaworu said with a hurt look on his face, " I loved you, and I thought you loved me too." Then Kaworu ran out the door in a rush, after changing into his street clothes.

Shinji sat there for a while afterwards thinking. Then he realized, he kind of loved Kaworu too. Maybe not in the exact same degree, but he loved him all the same, he had emotions, feelings for him. He regretted yelling, and resolved to apologize. He would never get that chance.

Kaworu found a place to sit after walking for five hours. He loved that putrid lilim, and it had only bit him in return. He should have forced it, did what he originally wanted to do despite it's protests. No, he no longer had that in his being. He wanted that thing, but obviously it didn't want him.

So there was only one thing to do. There were a few hours left till the appointed time. He would then fuse with his father Adam, and begin a new world. The lilim would be wiped out, and the world would start anew. But what about Shinji?

April 26th, 2016 (one month till third impact.)

9:00 AM

NERV HQ: Control Room 2

The alarm had sounded suddenly! Pattern Blue detected in the cages! And angel was in NERV Central! And it was none other than Kaworu Nagisa. He had somehow activated Unit-02 without even entering an entry plug.

Misato had found Shinji, and was preparing him to enter the entry plug. Shinji was bewildered, he just couldn't believe Kaworu was the last angel. He had trusted him, and Kaworu had betrayed him. The entry plug was placed into Unit-01, and Shinji began his descent into Terminal Dogma. He had to ask Kaworu why he had betrayed him.

Kaworu was descending further down, none of the armor plates could stop him and Unit-02. As he went further down, he hummed it for what would be the last time, the last time anyone reproduced the melodies of the lilim. He felt some regret, but he knew his duty, and he couldn't avoid it. He only wished Shinji didn't have to go with them all. But it was all to late now, the ritual had to go on now that they knew what he was.

Down, down further into Dogma they went. Shinji caught up with Kaworu, but as soon as he did Unit-02 confronted him. In the intensive care unit, Asuka began to scream in the midst of her coma. The fight began, Shinji activated the Progressive Knife at the same time Unit-02 did, and they both sustained damage. Kaworu was impressed by Shinji, but also by the mental struggle Unit-02's original pilot was putting up.

Asuka's bond with her Unit-02 was still strong. She was feeling the pain inflicted on her unit, and trying to wrestle it from Kaworu's control. All the while, she was unaware of anything but the pain. Her instincts were amazing. He was impressed by her struggle, but he couldn't let her or Shinji win, though they did make a formidable team.

He wondered if that was a coincidence, or whether it had anything to do with Shinji's rejection. They had a strong bond, it had a tinge of sorrow and resentment, but an underlying feeling that was familiar to him. He pondered this as they broke the final plate of armor. Now was the time, the hour of reckoning. The symphony was finally coming to a magnificent end.

He approached Heaven's Door and transmitted the appropriate code. The door opened and before him stood the behemoth known as Adam, the being from whence he came. He stared at it, something didn't seem right. Then he realized, this wasn't Adam, this was Lilith. Lilith, as in the lilim.

It all became clear to him, if he bonded, only he would survive, there would be no new race, just him, and he would live forever. In the end it would be nice. But then he pondered what he had achieved in his existence. Not much, but the lilim had achieved so much, they had music, art, and many other beautiful things. So why should he survive instead of them?

He made his decision just as Unit-01 crashed in. Shinji had disabled Unit-02, but his unit was badly damaged. Kaworu knew it could never win a fight against him, but he made his decision. He disengaged his ATField and let Unit-01's fist envelop him. Shinji asked Kaworu why. Kaworu explained to him that only one race would survive, and he believed the lilim to be the existence that truly deserved to live.

Shinji began to cry. Kaworu said to him, "Shinji, it is the destiny of the lilim to shape the future, it's what you all live for. I truly loved you, so I ask of you this one last favor, end me, end me so that you may live. They were silent for what seemed like forever. Shinji didn't want to destroy Kaworu, but he knew he had too.

He squeezed Unit-01's fist till he heard a pop.

Tabris was defeated.

The alert was lowered.

Unit-01 was retrieved from Dogma.

April 26th, 2016

7:18 PM

On the shore of the Third Oshinoka lake, former Tokyo-3 residential district.

Shinji sat weeping while the waves lapped the shore. Misato stood behind him as he told her about Kaworu. Then he said, "He's the one who deserved to live, not me." Misato wouldn't stand for such a comment from Shinji, but he was in an emotional state, so she tried to be as delicate as possible. "Shinji, Kaworu didn't have the will to live. In the end you were meant to survive."

"Misato, you just don't understand. I, I wanted to commit suicide. I was going to after the last angel was gone. Now I just can't bring myself to do it though." "Shinji, im glad you didn't, it proves you have the will to live.", Misato said.

They stood there for a little while longer. The Misato said to him, "I was going to wait till after the last angel was gone to tell you this, and im guessing now is just the time. Shinji, once were discharged from NERV, your going to live with me. Were going too get a house on Hokkaido, and you'll live a normal life." Shinji didn't look up, didn't respond.

Then he asked her, "What about Asuka?" "She has to go back to Germany, but you'll have time to say goodbye." Shinji felt the pit of his stomach drop. Feelings of despair returned to him. Now he was going to loose another person he loved.

Why did I have to survive?

To be continued

*I know, another depressing chapter, and the next one isn't going to be very cheery either, but the end is going to be perfect, never fear. Till next time, take care. I hope to have another chapter real soon, we will see.


	6. DDay The End of Everything

_*** This chapter will be a little unique, im going to focus more on Asuka's instrumentality. Hope you like it. One more chapter to go!**_

_**D-Day **_

_**(The End of Everything)**_

_**May 25h**__**, 2016**_

_**6:24 AM**_

_**NERV HQ**_

_**Office of Major Misato Katsuragi**_

_**It had been a month since the Tabris incident, but NERV was still operational. Commander Ikari had declared an alert, and nobody had been allowed to begin packing. Asuka was still in intensive care, there had been no effort to transport her to Germany. And she was still stuck here, she had been ready to start her new life with Shinji, but they were stuck here. The poor boy had not had any time to heal his emotional wounds. **_

_**She had already bought the property, but she had not been dismissed, and neither had Shinji. So for now the property was just sitting there, and Shinji was still stuck wallowing in his own misery. Still, she had her plans, on the way down there she planned to bring him sight seeing, and she was going to buy him new clothes, a new bathing suit, she was going to try to take his mind away from thinking about everything he had to endure at NERV. She hoped starting a new life would help Shinji considerably. She hoped starting a new life would help her.**_

_**Not surprisingly, Gendo had signed custody of Shinji over to Misato without evening asking. With Shinji in her custody and the house already bought, there was only one thing left she had to do. Kaji would have wanted her to do this. Hopefully she wouldn't get caught, or else she would be in the same boat as that bitch Ritsuko. There were secrets she had to uncover.**_

_**8:00 AM**_

_**Terminal Dogma: Server Room**_

_**In the cold of the server room, Misato was chilled for a different reason. It wasn't over, in fact, it was only the beginning. All of the sudden the alarms sounded. "Damn, their on to me", she muttered to herself. Then she realized those alarms were not meant for her. Something big was going down.**_

_**8:00 AM**_

_**Main Control Room**_

_**Someone was hacking in to the MAGI! The signals seemed to be coming from the MAGI in Matsushiro, Massachusetts, Beijing, Berlin, and Hamburg. It was a five pronged attack, and they couldn't do a thing about it. Then, Commander Ikari commanded them to bring Doctor Akagi to the control room. As he folded his hands he muttered, "This is our only hope.**_

_**8:12 AM**_

_**Within three minutes Ritsuko had set up a firewall that would last them forty-eight hours. Hopefully this would put a halt on SEELE's plans till then. As Ritsuko slid out of Caspar's server, she slid her hand over the cover for the artificial brain. Looking fondly she said, "Well mother, ill see you soon." She knew SEELE wouldn't let them off this easy. **_

_**10:00 AM**_

_**NERV HQ: Service Hall 18**_

_**He didn't care that he had signed his death warrant. He knew they would be there to kill him soon. And he just didn't care, sure Misato was going to bring him to Okinawa, but he didn't care, without Asuka he just didn't feel like living anymore. He only hoped they could save her somehow. He had nothing to live for anymore. **_

_**He sat crying for another half hour. In the distance he could hear the shots being fired, the screams of the victims of the JSDF's invasion force. He only hoped they would finish him off quickly. His only regret was not being able to feel the caress of her lips one last time. He would miss her in the afterlife. **_

_**He still felt the guilt of loosing Kaworu too, but he was even more guilty about betraying Asuka. He just wanted to fade into the darkness and cease to be. He heard the shots being fired at the lock. He listened as the soldiers ran down the staircase and surrounded him. One of them spoke into the radio, confirming that they had located him.**_

_**One of them put the gun to his head and said, "Sorry kid, nothing personal." It was all over, with one pull of a trigger this man would end Shinji's pitiful existence. He heard a shot fired, but he wasn't dead. Two more, and then the final shot accompanied by the sound of blood and brains being spread upon the wall. He looked up and saw Misato standing over him, and as he saw the worried look on her face he began to cry.**_

_**10:30 AM**_

_**NERV HQ Internal Highway System**_

_**He felt guilty that he had been so selfish. The look on Misato's face though had given him a reality check. He knew he couldn't be so selfish, sure it was his life, but he never really thought about how Misato would feel. As she drove he felt he had to make it up to her. He reluctantly leaned his head on her shoulder and closed her eye's, wishing that he had been more considerate, wishing that Asuka was there to hold him. **_

_**11:30 AM**_

_**Bottom of the lake**_

_**She woke up to pain. The missiles rained down on her. And the only thing she could think about death. The only thing she could think about were her regrets. The only thing she could think about was her Shinji. **_

_**12:30 PM**_

_**Elevator to Cage 2**_

_**He could only cry. Misato had kissed him, and pushed him into the elevator, she had sacrificed her life for him. Why would she do that? In her last moments she treated him like a man, she was the first person who had ever done such a thing. Why would she do that for a worm like him. **_

_**He wasn't worth it, all he really was, all he amounted to was a dirty whore, anyone would do for him. Now he was sitting by the cage, it was full of Bakelite. He was useless, he couldn't even help Asuka, the one person he might just love the most. He wanted to help her, but all he could do was just wallow in his own misery. Then suddenly the room rumbled as Unit-01 tore itself out of the cage.**_

_**3:00 PM**_

_**????????**_

_**So, that idiot had started the end. The third impact had happened. But what was happening to her? Was she dead? She was just floating, floating in nothingness. **_

_**Then the voices began. "Why do you exist Asuka? Do you only exist to prove yourself?"**_

"_**I exist for myself, im Asuka Langley Soryu, I only need myself! Who are you to ask me this!?"**_

_**Suddenly someone appeared before her. It was like she was looking into a mirror. "I am you, and I must tell you, you haven't been very true to me." "How the hell can you be me!?" "I am the you that observes you, and you have not been true to me, or that boy."**_

"_**Do you mean that damn idiot Shinji!?" The voice responded with a laugh and said, "See, another defensive mechanism, you just can't admit that you really had feelings for him. But you cannot lie to me, I am you and you can never truly deceive yourself." "Shut up, you are not me and I do not love that stupid, good for nothing, usele…." The other Asuka slapped her with a smile on her face and said, "Again you lie to me, but when you lie to me you only hurt yourself."**_

_**Asuka looked down and screamed. Her body was cover in gashes, and she was bleeding out. She closed her eyes and began to sob. Then she felt a gentle pair of arms caress her. She re-opened her eyes and looked at the person holding her. It was Shinji, he looked at her with a loving look of concern on her face. **_

_**She began to blush and relax, but suddenly he opened his arms and faded into what seemed like a mist, leaving her in complete darkness. She felt cold and lonely. She began to cry again, and as she did, she returned to the form of a child. Then the voice returned. "See, as much as you try to deny them, you cannot truly hide your feelings from yourself." The voice smiled again as it stood over the weeping child. **_

_**8:00 PM**_

_**?????????**_

_**For hours it continued, the voice harassed her and probed every part of her being. She felt broken. She felt like it would never end. Was this hell? Was this voice the devil, judging her for her sins? **_

_**She was cut open time and time again, and healed every time. She began to hate her very existence. She wished it would end, she wished she could just fade away. The pain was unbearable. Over and over, she was raped, shot, tortured. **_

_**May 26**__**th**__**, 2016**_

_**7:00 AM**_

_**?????????**_

_**The first words in hours. They were the first words she had uttered in hours. She had yelled them from the top of her lungs. "WHY ME!? What did I do!?"**_

_**Then it stopped, the torture stopped. The voiced appeared again, this time it was Kaji. It said, "I told you that dishonesty would only hurt yourself." She knew it wasn't Kaji, but she still tried to hug it and cry. It slapped her again saying, "I thought we were done lying." **_

_**She cried and huddled up. "What is it you want from me?" It said, "The question is, what do you want from you?" She sobbed, this voice kept speaking in riddles, expecting an answer and if she gave the wrong one she would endure unimaginable pain. The voice told her, "You must endure this pain so that you can become true to yourself and the one you love."**_

_**She closed her eyes and sobbed some more. She knew who she loved, but she just couldn't bring herself to say it. She would rather die than say it. Again she felt it, this time it was just a gentle hand. Then another wrinkled hand accompanied it.**_

_**She looked up and saw Shinji again, but this time he was not alone. Her grandmother was with him, and her foster mother, and her foster father, Hikari, Misato. They all said in unison, "Why is it that you cannot let us care for you, do you feel you don't deserve it, we thought you did." Then they all disappeared except Shinji. He gently touched her face, looked at her with an expression of affection and sadness and said, "Asuka, why are you afraid to let me love you?" **_

_**She was silent for the longest while. Shinji disappeared and she was still silent. She thought about those words. She thought she behaved the way she did so people would love her, but maybe she did it to make it hard for people to love her. "I want to be loved.", she said with anguish, crying all the while.**_

_**The voice then said, "You know what you must do then. You must be true to yourself. By lying to yourself you only hurt yourself and cause unimaginable anguish. You must love others by being honest to yourself." "But it's to late now, isn't it?" Asuka asked. **_

_**The voice, which had now taken the form of Rei smiled. "Do you really think that? Maybe you are getting a second chance." Asuka raised her head. "A second chance?"**_

_**12:00 PM**_

_**Elision Sea**_

"_**Shinji, it is time." Yui smiled at her son. Then she said, "Remember, any place can be paradise as long as you have the will to live." As he drifted back to the world that had been so cruel to him, he wondered what it would be like. He wondered if he would have Asuka there to greet him.**_

_**1:00 PM**_

_**Sea of Red**_

_**It all began tumbling down. The entire form began coming apart at the seams, seemingly rotting. As the being fell apart, all of the harpies began their descent as well. As they fell to the earth, thunder began to strike between the clouds. In the midst of all this chaos though, a beam of light came down from the clouds.**_

_**1:30 PM**_

_**Shore of the Sea of Red**_

_**They were just lying there on the shore of the beach. Both of them were unconscious. The beings smiled upon then, musing over the new genesis they had begun. This race of theirs had a bright new future. The children began to wake up, so the beings left. **_

_**Shinji was the first to arise. He looked around him at a world in ruins. He was quite disoriented, and couldn't think beyond the moment, he was relying on primal instincts. He looked over at Asuka, and primal feelings of rage and lust overcame him. He crawled over and tightly gripped his hands around her neck in a gesture of masculine dominance. **_

_**Asuka woke up to see him choking her. She just stared at him, then began to attempt to raise her hand. She lightly caressed his face. He realized what he was doing and loosened his grip. Then he began to cry. **_

_**She looked at him for a few seconds, and contemplated the sobbing boy on top of her. He looked pathetic, he looked so horrible. She wanted to say something at that moment, something that would culminate her feelings. "Disgusting.", she uttered. He opened his eyes in surprise as she followed up with, "My disgusting and lovable man."**_

_**To be continued**_

_*** I know this chapter was morbid and depressing, but the next chapter will be so loveable and sweet. I guarantee a happy ending, see you soon. - doggy-kun**_


	7. Chapter 7

_"Hey, I'm depressed while I'm writing this: my grandmother on my mom's side just died, and, due to family squabbles, I had not seen her in nine years. I'm really mad at my family, and I'm really depressed about my grandmother, but my work still must go on. This one's for you, grandmother; I love you, and I'm really going to miss you" - Shinjidoggysasuka._

Seven Days, Seven Ways to Say "I love you."

or

The Love That Survived the End of the World

_Thursday, Day 1_

She looked at him for a few seconds, and contemplated about the sobbing boy on top of her. He looked pathetic and horrible. She wanted to say something at that moment, something that would culminate her feelings. "Disgusting." she uttered. He opened his eyes in surprise as she followed up with, "My disgusting and lovable man."

He could not believe his ears. She actually called him loveable. Was she delusional? Did she think that he was Kaji? Asuka must have known he was thinking that because, at that moment, she said, "Yes, stupid, I was talking about you." Shinji promptly turned a bright shade of red and began to cry tears of sorrow, guilt, and happiness. He did not know what to think as he rolled off of Asuka's waist, but after he sat there for a minute, lying on the ground and thinking about what she said, he decided to act like the man she had just said he was.

He stood up and looked at the ruins of Tokyo-3, buildings sticking up out of the desolate lake made of a mixture of water and primordial ooze. Asuka sat up and looked with him. Shinji stared in deep thought, remembering all that had happened to him and thinking about the chance at a new life they had just been given. Then Asuka asked him, "Do you think anyone else is going to come back, or are we the last ones?" Shinji was silent, and for a second, she thought he was mad at her, but then he said, "It doesn't matter to me as long as I have you at my side forever." Now it was Asuka's turn to blush as she took in the full consequence of what Shinji had said.

Shinji smiled at her reaction; he felt good getting a rise out of her. Suddenly, she jumped up and punched Shinji in his groin. He fell to the ground and curled up in a ball. Asuka said, "Okay, casanova, fun time is over; we need to find a place to sleep before it gets dark." He groaned in pain, but as he looked up, he saw Asuka still blushing and smiling at his achievement.

He got up after he recovered from the blow, and they began to walk slowly along that beach of white sand. After walking for a while in silence, Shinji began to feel uncomfortable, so he broke the silence with a question that had just began to bother him, "Hey, Asuka, what are we going to eat and drink?" Asuka thought for a moment and answered, "Well, the shelters have ration supplies in them, don't they? We can eat those, and if we find ou–I mean, Misato's apartment, I'm sure we can find something in the fridge, and I'm sure the water is still running. Let's be optimistic, okay?" Shinji smiled at her and thought to himself that this was a new and different side of Asuka that he had never seen before, and he liked it.

Pretty soon, they came upon the ruins of a shelter. After checking inside, they found the rations. They ate a meal consisting of dry crackers and air packed apple sauce. They talked a bit over dinner, mainly about which way they were going to head tomorrow, how they were going to carry the rations, where they would find clothing for Asuka, and who they thought might come back. After dinner, they took blankets and made little nests for themselves in which to sleep. Before them both fell asleep, Shinji said to Asuka, "I really meant what I said back there."

_Friday, Day 2_

The next morning, Asuka woke to a magnificent sunrise. As she stared out of the hole in the wall, she began to think about how she would survive. Then, she turned to look at the lump under the blankets, the fairly sized loveable lump that she had neglected for so long, and she smiled. He had been a gentleman all night; he had not made one advance on her, even though she knew he wanted. She silently tiptoed over and sat down in front of him, admiring his handsome face in the morning sun.

Shinji slowly opened his eyes and smiled at the girl, no, the woman that sat in front of his eyes. He yawned and said good morning, then proceeded to remove the blankets. Suddenly, Asuka turned red and struck him while yelling, "Pervert!" Shinji looked down at the lump in his pants and then blushed while apologizing to Asuka. Giving him an indignant look, she said, "It's time for breakfast."

They ate in silence, Shinji was embarrassed and Asuka was fuming about how she could even begin to love a pervert like Shinji. After breakfast, Shinji threw some rations into a blanket and made a bundle. He told Asuka that they would both carry rations in their blankets and after some protest and negotiation, Asuka picked up her bundle, and they began to walk. They walked in silence for the first hour, and then Shinji asked Asuka about her childhood. Asuka told him a few things, only the good parts, and Shinji listened, nodded, and smiled. Then Asuka asked Shinji about his childhood.

Shinji stopped and a shadow passed over his face. Asuka looked worried and told Shinji, "It's okay, you don't have to tell me." Shinji looked at her and said, "No, it's okay, I'm fine; it's just that I don't have very fond memories, but I'll tell you a bit." So as they walked, Shinji told her about his childhood. As she listened, Asuka's heart began to melt; she actually began to feel sorry for Shinji. She felt like she knew him, and now he was not just perverted idiot Shinji; no, now he was a poor, dread ridden Shinji, a boy who needed her sympathy and love, not her scorn and disdain.

At noon, they stopped for lunch, and Asuka told him that she was glad she came back with him in a way, since they had a little bit of history. Shinji blushed and Asuka laughed. Asuka said, "You're such a fool, but since you're the last fool on Earth, you're my fool, my stupid boyfriend." Shinji turned beet red. Asuka laughed and said, "But don't think this means your getting some; you need to earn that, but you can have a kiss."

After saying this, she smiled and gave Shinji a peck on the cheek. "Any more of this and I might pass out; all of the blood in my body is rushing to the wrong place." Asuka laughed, and they finished eating. They kept walking for a while, and as they walked, they talked about things like television, books, school, things like that, things they might never experience again. They laughed and enjoyed each other's company. Asuka hit him in the side a few time, but they had lots of fun.

Around dark, they finally came to the apartment building. They found their old apartment and ate dinner. After dinner, they lit a few candles and went to their separate rooms. Before they closed the doors, the both kissed. As Shinji lay there in his bed, he smiled. Finally he was happy with his life, which was a little sad since it took then end of the world to get there.

_Saturday, Day 3_

Asuka woke up early again. She crept over to Shinji's room and looked at her little heart throb, who snored under the blanket. Usually, he was up before her, but for the last few days, he had been sleeping longer. Perhaps he was still tired from all that he went through in the Evangelion. After staring at him for a while, she decided to do something romantic.

She checked the refrigerator and found eggs and bread that were still good. The milk was bad, however, so it did not look like cereal was going to be on the menu. Still, she had decided to make her boy a breakfast in bed. After a few minutes, the skillet was sizzling, and Asuka was making scrambled eggs, and the smell began to fill the house. She was glad that she had at least learned to make that with her grandmother.

After she had managed to make some toast, slightly burnt but still good, she put everything onto a tray and brought it into Shinji's room. She kissed him on the head, and he slowly opened his eyes. He got up, being sure to cover his manhood this time unless he get another beating, and said good morning to Asuka. He smiled a sunny smile as she presented him with breakfast, and so they ate together in his bed. Shinji stared at Asuka. She looked good in her T-shirt and panties, and he was pleased that she was comfortable enough to be around him in nothing but that.

After breakfast, Shinji washed the dishes despite Asuka's protests, and when he was done, he suggested they go down to the basement and turn on the emergency generator. The generator drew its energy from solar power, but the storage and distribution unit was in the basement. They promptly walked down the five stories of stairs and into the basement. After fumbling around for a bit, they found the switch and pulled it, causing the mechanisms to whir to life. They spent the rest of the day on the roof cleaning the solar panels.

That evening, Shinji made them an Italian dinner: spaghetti with sprinkled parmesan cheese. He had found all of the ingredients in one of the apartments down the hallway. While eating, Shinji told Asuka about Misato's plan to adopt him and move to Okinawa. Asuka asked Shinji if he would have missed her. Shinji said, "I would have missed you a lot. I actually thought of asking Misato to bring you, too; it wouldn't have been the same without you."

Asuka stared at him and said, "How could I've neglected you all this time? I can't believe the sweetest man in the world was right under my nose, and I had been neglecting him all this time." Shinji frowned and said, "It's okay; I'm not really all that good."

"No, Shinji, you're the best. Don't say bad things about yourself." Asuka shouted. "You truly are the best. You're kind, considerate, loving, handsome, and gentlemanlike; you're a good cook, you can play the cello, you're so great, and you need to stop second guessing yourself."

Shinji stared at Asuka, then smiled and thanked her saying, "I'll never need to as long as I have you at my side." Shinji got up and brought in the Italian dessert – two cream filled cannoli. After dinner, they sat on the couch and watched old movies. Shinji felt like a man with Asuka's head on his chest. As they fell asleep together on the couch, Asuka said, "I love you, Shinji."

_Sunday, Day 4 _

This time, Shinji and Asuka woke up at the same time. They smiled at each other and kissed. They had slept the entire night on the couch together, and they were both wanted to sleep longer, but they knew they had to get something done that day. Shinji made breakfast, but this time he tried to teach Asuka while cooking. She watched him and tried to remember each step he taught her. She did not want Shinji to come always to the rescue.

After breakfast, they began to search the apartment building. Asuka found some clothing for Shinji, a package of unused boxer briefs that were his size. She was glad that she had asked such intimate questions; they came in handy from time to time. Shinji found some cooking supplies, some jewelry for Asuka, and some milk cartons that someone had frozen in a block of ice. He could not figure out why, but he was glad they had, this was probably the last milk they would have in a long while.

After a quick lunch at noon, Asuka made peanut butter sandwiches. They left the building to search the area. They found a grocery store that was still very dry. While stocking up on dry goods, Asuka asked Shinji about when he realized that he loved her. Shinji told her it was the night before the battle with Israfel, when he tried to kiss her in her sleep. She blushed and smiled saying, "I was pissed about that then, but now I'm happy.

They both smiled and got back to work. They were both glad of each others company. A few days ago, Asuka would have been at Shinji's throat, but now she would not have picked anyone else in the world with whom to survive. A few days ago, Shinji would have been afraid to even smile at Asuka, but now, it was the only thing that he could do when their eyes meet. Even through all of the pain they felt as a result, even though the world was over and civilization was dead, they had to admit the Third Impact had changed their lives for the better and made it easier to show their feelings for each other. They would be happy just having each other for the rest of their lives, and from the looks of it, that was how things were going to turn out.

When they got back to their apartment, they both went to their rooms and changed. Shinji tried on the boxer briefs Asuka gave him. They felt good, they were soft, and they did not squeeze his manhood as much as the briefs. He decided since that, since they were the only ones around, he would show Asuka his new boxers. He walked out of his room with only them on.

Because Asuka was in the kitchen, he sneaked up behind her and caught her with a hug. Asuka elbowed Shinji and said, "What did I tell you about getting some?" Shinji groaned and sat on the floor holding his sides. Asuka turned and grinned at the sight of the boy in nothing but his skivvies. She thought that he looked shot: his leaned sides, his tan-ish complexion, his fuzzy black hair, his pitiful face, and his lean feet. At that moment, he was beautiful to her.

She smiled and helped him up. After that, Shinji cooked dinner in his boxers. Then they watched television with Shinji still in his boxers, and they went to bed. Still, Asuka had held him that night in his boxers, and that felt like an achievement to him; after all, if he had hugged her in his boxers a few months earlier, she would have sent him to the hospital.

_Monday, Day 5 _

The next morning, Shinji woke to see Asuka staring in his face. He smiled and asked her what was going on. She told him that they would not be able to get out that day since it was raining, so Shinji went back to sleep. Asuka let him sleep till noon and woke him up for lunch. After lunch, they sat in the living room and watched old movies.

Around 3:00PM, the showers let up so Shinji insisted upon getting some work done. He did not want to feel like he had not done anything today. He did have to set a standard after all as the last man on Earth, since he apparently would be holding that title. There was something that tickled him about this little paradox, seeing as how he was such a pitiful excuse for a man. Still, he was the last one in existence, and, because he had Asuka, he was the last and happiest man in the world. He was glad that Asuka had chosen him in the end, instead of following through on past comments to the effect of "not even if you were the last guy on the planet."

Shinji decided to go all the way back to the bomb shelter to get some of the frozen dried food. As he walked, he wished Asuka had come along, but she had decided to stay back because it was to wet and slippery for her to go out. He could not wait to get back to sit on the couch with her, him in his brown shorts and blue t-shirt, her in her sun yellow dress. He blushed at the thought. She may have been making him take the brunt of the work, but he did not mind; she had been kinder to him in the last few days then when they had first met. He had never seen her act this tender towards anyone, not even Kaji. He felt special.

He was exhausted by the time he got to the shelter, so he decided to rest for a bit. While he sat he thought about everything that had happened, all that had been lost, all that he had gained. He felt guilty that so many people had to die: Kaworu, Kaji, Hyuga, Misato, Maya, Hikari; they all died while he had survived to live in this moment. It hurts to think that, but his one consolation was the thought that they would have been happy to see him happy. That thought cut the edge off of the pain and guilt.

After his little rest, he put as much food as he could into the blankets and made a humongous bundle. Then, he began the trip back to the apartment. As he walked, he noticed that the sky was still cloudy. When he was half of the way back, it began to rain again, so he ran to get the rest of the way home. It was a torrential downpour, and Shinji was quickly soaked from head to toe. Shinji could not wait to get home and change into some warm cloths, have a warm meal, and enjoy holding Asuka under a warm blanket.

When he got to the apartment, he saw Asuka waiting for him at the door. He began to quickly run up the stairs, forgetting that the soles of his shoes were muddy and wet. On the fourth flight of stairs, he slipped and fell down to the landing. The fall knocked him unconscious, and Asuka, worried that he was seriously hurt, came rushing down the stairs. She caressed his head while checking his pulse, and after confirming it, brought him up to the apartment.

Asuka quickly whisked the boy out of his wet clothing and wrapped him in a blanket. When she was sure he would be okay, she made some warm broth and tried to feed him. She had never been so worried in her life. The bruised boy in front of her looked vulnerable, and the only thought that she could form was a wish for his well being. She fell asleep worrying over the poor unconscious teenager.

_Tuesday, Day 6 _

When Asuka woke up the next morning, Shinji was still unconscious. She was worried, but the most she could do was to start breakfast so Shinji would have something to eat when he woke up. As she finished putting bacon and eggs onto a plate, she heard a groan from the living room. She smiled, and then prepared a glass of water for Shinji. She brought the eggs out and said, "Good morning, Shinji. I made some breakfast for you. How are you feeling?"

Shinji groaned and replied, "Like someone decided to use me as a piñata. I feel miserable." Asuka clicked her tongue and said, "It'll be okay. I'll take care of you, and you'll be my big sexy baby for the day." Shinji gave her an apathetic look, and she laughed. Then, she went to the bathroom to get him some aspirin. When she came back, she gave him the aspirin and watched him how he ate.

When he was done, she put on some more old movies. They sat in the entire day watching every DVD and VHS they could find, excluding Misato's pornography. Shinji was feeling better in the evening, so he helped Asuka make dinner. They had a wonderful dinner together, and when they finished cleaning up, they sat down for another movie. It was an old love movie, an American classic known as "Casablanca".

After the movie, Asuka looked at Shinji and asked him out of the blue, "You want to have sex?" Shinji looked startled for a second, and then he asked her why she wanted it all of a sudden. She kissed him and said, "I think we are ready. When you fell yesterday, I thought I lost you for a second. I was worried, and now, I know that I want all of you – body, mind, and soul." Shinji saw the passionate look in her eyes and knew that at that moment, he would never love anyone as much as he loved her at this moment. Shinji replied, "I love you, Asuka, and I want to show you that love."

Asuka slipped Shinji's shirt over his head, tenderly kissing his abdomen. Shinji unbuttoned her tight shorts and slowly slipped them over her feet. They kissed for another fifteen minutes, while slowly slipping of articles of clothing till they were both naked on the floor. Asuka decided to take the lead, so she grabbed his rock-hard member and guided it to her tight wet spot. Shinji gave her a look as if asking for permission, and, after she nodded, plunged it into her tightness.

He slowly moved into her; pulled slowly out, pushed slowly forward. He repeated this motion until Asuka got frustrated and said, "It's okay, you can go as fast as you want; I want this to be good for both of us." Shinji gave her an embarrassing look, and began to thrust faster till they were both moaning in the throes of ecstasy. Both of them had never felt so good. Sure, they had had sex before, but this time, it was different. It was not just pure pleasure. They felt like they were one. They felt as if they were one body, one mind, one soul. It was the most passionate and pleasure filled moment either of them had ever shared.

After a few minutes, both of them had reached their limits. Asuka climaxed as Shinji came, and both cried out at that moment. They lay there for a while, just breathing. Shinji's member was still inside Asuka, but neither of them made an effort to separate, by now this, felt like second nature to them; they did not even need to go for another round. They were content just to lay there with each other, enjoying one another's presence as they fell asleep.

_Wednesday, Day 7_

They woke up the next morning at the same time. After kissing Shinji, Asuka got up and made him breakfast. After she put the bacon on the stove, she got Shinji a glass of water and some aspirin and handed them to him saying, "You're feeling sore, are you, lover boy?" Shinji blushed and nodded saying, "I am, but I can get used to feeling sore like this if I can feel as good as you made me feel last night. Asuka blushed and said, "Oh, your just saying that to make me feel better."

Shinji slowly got up, then grabbed her waist and said, "No, I really mean it. Those were the best seven minutes of my life." Asuka smiled and kissed Shinji and then walked back to the kitchen to finish breakfast. Shinji slipped on his boxer-briefs. Then, he came to the kitchen to help her, but before he even picked up a pan, he grabbed her in a passionate embrace, kissed her and whispered, "I love you." Asuka smiled, and they cooked breakfast together, enjoying every moment, thankful that they had each other.

_"Well, it's finally over, and, as I sit here at 5:00 in the morning, listening to Utada Hikaru's "Beautiful World", I feel a sense of achievement, and an empty feeling, too. But still, because we finally have a happy ending after all of that depressing stuff, I would say that this story is a success. One last time, I would like to thank my fans. I do this for you really, and I hope that you all will enjoy my next fan fiction. Till then, I wish you good luck and good health." _– _Shinjidoggysasuka_


End file.
